it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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