I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
