dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
