Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
