I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
