the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
