you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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