Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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