I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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