so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
