Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
