Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
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