He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
