her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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