she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
