So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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