Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
