Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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