do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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