omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I use my feet as sexual weapons
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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