Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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