just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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