and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
