thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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