Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
40s are totally the cure
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
