Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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