do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
