Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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