We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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