there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
