I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
