so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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