The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Your topless pictures make me question reality
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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