Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Quick, to the slutcave!
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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