whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
