This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
