trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
