I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I'm both gender and math confused
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
