I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I think my vagina is haunted
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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