why didn't you poke me back
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
no you cant smoke seaweed
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
