Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Randomize
