I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Randomize
