Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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