oh god the rape fog is back!
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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