Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
high people should be assigned attendants
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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