There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You ate ashes out of my bong
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
