and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Randomize
