What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
