are you still at the devil's house?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
