I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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